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Letting Go of Mom Guilt: A Guide to Self-Compassion
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Guilt is a feeling we all experience when we think we’ve fallen short of expectations, whether they’re set by ourselves or others.
Mom guilt, specifically, is when we feel like we’re not doing enough for our children, regardless of whether we’re stay-at-home moms, working moms, young moms, or older moms. Nearly every mom encounters it at some point. Our inner voice can be both our biggest cheerleader and our harshest critic, making us feel like we’re not spending enough time with our kids, not cooking perfect meals, not keeping a spotless house, or missing important milestones.
As parents, we have certain expectations for how we want to raise our children, often based on our own upbringing, societal pressures, and what we hope our kids will achieve.
While becoming a parent is a joyful experience, it can also bring feelings of overwhelm, anger, anxiety, stress, or depression, all of which contribute to mom guilt.
We all have limited time each day to accomplish everything we need to do, so it’s important to prioritize tasks. Making a list and staying organized can help reduce feelings of overwhelm and stress. Remember, it’s okay if some things don’t get done right away.
Don’t compare yourself to others, whether it’s friends, family, or people on social media. Every parent and child is unique, so comparing yourself to others is both unhealthy and unrealistic.
There’s no such thing as a perfect mom, so be kind to yourself and respect your own differences.
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Guilt and stress can have long-term health consequences, including increased blood pressure, depression, obesity, sleep problems, and other risks of illness. Taking care of yourself is essential for being able to care for others.
Don’t feel guilty about taking time for yourself— it doesn’t have to be fancy or expensive. Recharge your batteries by trying simple activities such as:
Exercising
Taking a Walk
Having a Bath or Shower Alone
Reading
Watching TV
Painting Your Nails
Spending Time with Friends
Practicing Prayer or Meditation
Don’t hesitate to reach out to WIC, a trusted friend, or seek professional help, if you’re struggling. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a sign of strength. Parenting is full of constant changes and challenges, but it’s important to let go of guilt, practice self-compassion, and recognize that you’re doing the best you can with the knowledge and resources you have. Your children love you unconditionally, imperfections and all.