Healthy Growth, Happy Kids

July 19, 2023 Children

“I worry Kimmy will get fat, so I try to get her to not eat so much,” one mom confided. The next mom shared, “I let Mika watch TV when he eats so I can get a couple more bites in. He’s too skinny.” It’s natural to compare your child to others, but how can you know if your child is growing in a healthy way, and what can you do to support healthy growth?

Children come in all shapes and sizes. Unfortunately there is a lot of confusion about growth. If your child is bigger or smaller than average and has always been that way, that’s reassuring. Your child may be the smallest or biggest in their day care or playgroup and still be healthy. The numbers on a growth chart are not like a report card. It’s not better to be 75th% than 25th%, or the other way around.

However, if your child isn’t gaining or is losing weight, your doctor and nutrition expert will want to be sure there isn’t a medical problem. They’ll want to be sure that your child is getting a good balance of foods and activity — something that’s good for all kids! Your health care team will also want to take a closer look if your child is gaining weight quickly or their growth is suddenly different than usual.

Feeding for Healthy Growth

Trying to make your child eat more or less to make them gain weight faster or slower can backfire. If Kimmy’s mom tries to make her eat less, Kimmy may whine for food, eat quickly, get food on her own and eat more than she needs. If Mika’s mom tries to make him eat more and they battle over it, Mika can’t tell if he’s hungry or full and chances are he won’t eat or grow any better, either!

Thinking about what your child eats is important, but research shows that how you feed also matters. A way of feeding that helps children grow well is called the “Division of Responsibility,” where parents and children have divided jobs. You decide what, when and where your child eats, and they decide how much to eat or whether to eat at all during meals and snacks. Remember — sitting down at the table is the healthiest and safest place for your child to eat. They learn by watching and you can make sure they don’t choke.

What Else Affects Growth?

If your family tends to be short and stocky, or tall and lean, your child will likely be too. But that’s only part of the puzzle. Research tells us that not enough sleep, skipping meals, too much TV or screen time, and stress can interfere with healthy growth.

Tips to Support Healthy Growth:

Offer meals and snacks at around the same times most days — this will keep your child from “grazing.”
Offer water from a favorite cup between meals and snacks.
Start with small portions and allow more. Some meals will be bigger, some smaller. They may leave food. It’s hard to waste food, but it’s better than making your child eat, and you’ll waste less in the long run.
Look for fun ways for your toddler to play and be active.
Help your child get enough sleep. Toddlers need about 12-14 hours in 24 hours. A bedtime routine helps your child get to bed around the same time most nights: try a bath, a song or two, tuck them in and read a book.
If you allow screens like TV, save it for earlier in the day and try not to have screens where children sleep.

With small children and the demands of work and daily life, there can be a lot of stress. Having a routine can go a long way to ease stress for you and your child. Not fighting over how much your child eats will make meals a time to connect and enjoy each other. Although Kimmy and Mika are different sizes, they can be fed the same way and grow up healthy and happy.